The Log

Keigh Ahr


That dont look good. Jimmy Saunders lifted his chin, pointing it beyond the windshield of his van. In the passenger seat next to Jimmy, Rex Ankiel saw blue oscillating lights in the late afternoon dusk behind the hill they were approaching.

As the van crested the hill, the source of the flashing lights became visible through the frigid March rain. Parked on the left side of the road was a police squad car, the vehicles azure lanterns rotating silently on its roof. An officer stood in the middle of the road, the back of his poncho reflecting the vans headlights. He held a long flashlight in his right hand at shoulder height, the beam aimed down like a spear. Jimmy stopped the van several yards behind the officer.

Whats he standing there for? Rex asked, unable to see through the foggy wall of cold rain.

There, in front of him, Jimmy said. Rex squinted and finally saw the object the officer was examining - a tree, its wide trunk lying across the width of the road, thin fingers of branches extending up. Remnants of bark and leafless branches lay on the pavement around the officer, now speaking into a communicator on his left shoulder.

Rex frowned. A high school senior in the rural town of Bark Bay, he couldnt afford further delays in getting back to his familys trailer, as practice with his schools fencing team had run later than usual this Tuesday. Rex also didnt want to test the patience of Mr. Saunders, the teams new assistant coach, whod reluctantly agreed to give Rex a ride when a long walk home had become the teens only other option.

The tree had fallen from a thick forest on the right side of the road. Rex saw an open field on the opposite side. Can we get around it?

Not in this 窪蹋勛圖厙. Summertime, or maybe even winter when the grounds frozen. But in this spring mud, wed likely get stuck. Aint taking no chances, Slim. Jimmy tapped the dashboard twice with his right hand. I make deliveries in this van for my catering business. This vehicle goes into the shop, Im screwed.

Rex pointed his thumb behind them. We could turn around and take the county road.

Didnt you say you live a little way up from here? When Rex nodded, Jimmy added, Way that county road bends, circling back might take half an hour. Outside the van, the officer continued talking into his communicator. Lets see if we can find out when theyre fixing to move this log.

Rex sank back into his seat, puffed his cheeks, exhaled. Hed considered skipping practice that morning when his mother couldnt get herself out of bed, but being on the fencing team was one of his few pleasures at high school. He was a frequent target of abuse for several reasons: his unusual height and thin frame, his familys dependence on food stamps and welfare, and his absent father, whose Iroquois ancestry was evident in Rexs face. When teachers or administrators werent within listening distance, students called him the Starving Scarecrow, Chief Scarecrow, Red Skeleton, and lately, the Iriqueer. Rex wondered how many of his abusers knew how close this latest insult came to the truth.

The fencing team, though, was different. Every student on the squad had some characteristic that marked them as different, unorthodox, odd, geeky, or just plain weird. During practice each Tuesday afternoon he was just Rex, a fencer, a teammate. Rex was glad hed gone to practice that day. He just hoped this delay wouldnt last much longer.

The officer stopped talking into his communicator, then turned and approached the van. Guess its time, Jimmy grumbled as he pressed the button to roll down his window. He then extended his arms across the top of the steering wheel, palms down, fingers loose. Rex understood the gestures significance; one of Bark Bays few African-American residents was identifying a reality Rex didnt want to recognize existed in their small town.

The officer stopped and pointed his flashlight at the van, its beam flooding the cabin. Jimmy frowned but kept his arms extended over the wheel. The beam lowered, found the license plate, then raised back up. The officer took two steps forward, stopping outside the driver door and pointing his flashlight directly onto Jimmys face.

Squinting, Jimmy asked, You make a call about getting that log out the way?

Theres a tow truck coming. Had dispatch call a shop soon as I got here. The officer flicked his beam at the side of the van, then back up at Jimmy. Does the owner of this van know youre out driving it tonight?

Jimmy scowled. Youre speaking to the owner of this van. You must be new in town.

Two months, yes. The officer stepped back and directed his light to the side of the van. He then lowered his flashlight, took several more steps back, then spoke again into the communicator on his left shoulder.

Surprised I aint seen this rookie cop before today, Jimmy said, his voice low and terse. Usually only takes them a week to pull me over for something - taillight out, rolling stop, forgetting to signal. The rain began falling more steadily, drumming on the roof of the van.

Rex was uncomfortable with Jimmys tone. I really appreciate youre driving me home tonight, Rex said.

No problem, Slim. Softness had returned to Jimmys voice. Daniel really had you kyids working tonight.

Weeks earlier, Rex had noted how Jimmy pronounced the word kid as if it contained an extra y, kyid. Coach Dan wants us to be ready for our tournament this Saturday. You coming?

Weekends when I make my money, Slim. Bad enough Daniel has me come in to help on my off day. Dan Jacobs was known as Mr. Jacobs when he taught English at Bark Bay High School but as Coach Dan when he led the schools fencing team. When Coach Dan had introduced Jimmy at the first practice after the holidays, Rex and his teammates hadnt known how to react. From what little they knew of him, Jimmy was reclusive, often terse, a perception reinforced by his saying just call me Jimmy, none of this Mr. Saunders stuff and if one of you fools calls me Coach Jimmy Ill have you running laps out in the cold. His criticism was brusque, keep your fool back straight, youre fencing not digging a ditch, but was proficient with the epee, Rexs preferred fencing weapon, and nearly as tall as the lanky teen. In the brief time theyd worked together, Rex had begun feeling Jimmy would become more helpful to his game than even Coach Dan had been.

Outside the van, the officer looked up at Jimmy, then turned around and spoke again into his shoulder communicator. If you got a tournament this weekend, Jimmy said to Rex, Im surprised your friend Jolly wasnt at practice tonight. John Johnson, Rexs closest friend on the team, insisted everyone call him Double-J. Jimmy, however, seemed to have his own name for everyone on the team.

Double-J said he had to work. And you know he doesnt like being called Jolly, Rex replied.

Jolly takes himself too serious. Wheres he work?

Hes a mechanic, at Leftys Auto Shop.

Thats where I go to get my van worked on. Surprised Lefty lets him work there, Jimmy said.

Because hes a student?

More on account of his temper, Slim. Had one myself at his age, but nothing like Jollys. Hes always picking a fight with someone. Imagine hes not too pleasant to work with.

Rex laughed. Double-J says being angry is what makes him a good fencer.

Jimmy shook his head. First lesson my coach taught me was to have a clear mind when youre fencing, and youre mind aint clear when youre angry. Jolly needs to control himself. Needs a haircut too. Double-Js black hair extended well past his shoulders but he refused to tie it back, except when ordered by a judge during tournaments. Surprised that boys mess dont get caught in a fan belt or something.

This was already the longest non-fencing conversation Rex had held with Jimmy. The teen decided it was time to explore a topic that had been percolating among the fencing team since Jimmys arrival. Mind if I ask you a question?

Jimmy snorted. Got nothing better to do.

You obviously know fencing, but howd Coach Dan get you to help with the team? Hes a teacher, were students, but you dont have any connection to the school. Jimmys pronounced Southern accent, combined with a refusal to discuss his background, had inspired rumors within the team about Jimmys arrival to Bark Bay in the first place. The speculation was often outlandish: Jimmy was on the run from the law or a debt he couldnt repay; he had abandoned a family, a woman hed never married and the children hed fathered; his business went bankrupt and he came to Bark Bay in humiliation; hed fled the south pursued by a mob of hooded Klansmen firing shotguns and brandishing a burning cross. Rex had ridiculed these stories and called out the not-so-subtle racism, but he needed facts to dismiss the lurid fictions.

Total coincidence, Jimmy replied. I was working a party in December, and Daniel was one of the guests. Heard him talk to someone about being the fencing coach at the school while I was switching out a tray. Told him Id been a fencer too, back in the day.

Which college?

Never had no use for college, Slim. I went to a parochial high school, had this friend on the fencing team who talked me into going to practice one day. Damnedest sport Id ever seen. Had a good time, so I went back the next practice. Wound up fencing all four years of school, then a couple more after that. He looked over at Rex and smiled. Once Daniel heard me say that, he took my business card and told me he needed a hand with you kyids. Called me the next day, and kept calling me until I said yes. Outside the van, the officer turned around and walked towards them. Guy must have an update, Jimmy said, extending his arms over the steering wheel again.

The officer came up to the drivers door and jabbed the beam of his flashlight back into the cabin. Step out of the van, the officer ordered.

Rex saw Jimmys jaw tighten. Can I ask why? Jimmy asked.

I need to verify your appearance against the description of a person involved in an incident this afternoon.

Jimmy stared back at the officer a moment. Was this incident at a gas station on Water Street? Jimmy asked. Around 2?

The officer swallowed as wet snow mixed with rain continued falling on him. A citizen reported a confrontation at that place and time with a man who fits your description.

An African-American male, right? Jimmy appeared to be speaking more slowly than usual, as if he were silently editing his words. Theres no reason for me to step out of the van, because Ill confess to being the man involved in this so-called incident. But there was no confrontation, officer. It was an argument of no consequence.

He says you threatened

I made no threat, officer. Rex had often heard this tone in Jimmys voice during practice: Listen up, Im not messing with you no more. I was returning to this van after buying coffee from inside the store when a man called out to me, saying Id parked too close to his car. I showed him my wheels were within the yellow lines, then told him to get lost. I then got in my van and drove away. This incident was a dispute over a parking space. I can give you the names of a few people who were in the lot and witnessed our argument, and if you called them they would verify there was no threat made. But you have more important matters to attend to, officer. Such as finding out whats taking so long to get this damn log out the way.

The officer seemed unsure how to respond. Rex silently pleaded with him to walk away from the escalating tension. But the officer then cleared his throat and pointed the beam of his flashlight squarely into Jimmys face. Get out of the van.

My stepping out into the cold wont do anything to help with this log.

Its my duty

To investigate an argument over a parking space? Jimmys voice was now simmering, on the verge of boiling.

The officer gritted his teeth. Im going to ask again

The tow truck! Rex followed his cry by pointing to the flashing amber lights that had caught the corner of his vision. The officer glanced at the approaching lights as the outline of a vehicle with a winch extending from its back became visible in the vans headlights.

The officer looked back up at Jimmy. Dont move, he commanded, then turned and walked towards the approaching truck. Rex looked over at Jimmy, whose face was tight with fury. The truck squealed to a stop, and the officer stepped over the fallen tree. Well look at that, Jimmy said, his voice cooling. Jim Dandy to the rescue.

The tow truck drove off the road, its wide tires digging into the soft shoulder, then reversed back onto the pavement, the tall boom winch at the vehicles rear now facing the fallen tree. The driver of the tow truck exited the vehicle and stepped forward into the beams of the vans headlights as the officer approached. When Rex saw the curtain of black hair down the drivers back, he gasped.

Holy shit. Rex glanced back at the truck and read the words painted on the rear fender: Leftys Auto Shop. Thats Double-J.

Jolly? Jimmy asked. Rex nodded silently, his attention on his fencing teammate. The officer waved down at the tree lying across the road; Double-J nodded, turning back towards the tow truck.

The officer then waved towards the van, and Rex saw his chest ripple with laughter. Double-J stopped and turned towards the officer, his face twisting into a scowl. The officer stopped laughing.

This dont look good, Jimmy said. Double-J pointed at the officer and spoke, his words coming through the vans open window. What the fuck did you say?

Rex sank into his seat. Dont be an idiot, Double-J.

The officer pointed at the log, and Rex heard him ordering Double-J to proceed with clearing the road. Double-Js face erupted in anger. Dumb-ass piece of shit

Rex reached for his window control and pressed it down. Hed seen Double-J start enough fights, both verbal and physical, to know what was coming next. He watched in horror as Double-J stepped towards the officer and jabbed his right index finger in accusation, his angry voice becoming clearer as Rexs window descended. You racist motherfucker 

Shit! Jimmys sudden yell startled Rex, who watched in disbelief as Jimmy thrust open his door and raced into the cold night air. Jimmy ran forward and jumped on the fallen tree, then pointed at Double-J - Get your ass back in that damn truck! Double-J threw his arms up angrily as Jimmy continued pointing at him. Youve been called to do a job, so do it! I got no time for your foolishness, boy! Your friends back there riding in my van and I need to get him home, then get my own self home, and the only thing thats keeping us from getting where we need to go is this damn log. Youre the only one with the ability to move this thing, so shut your damn mouth, get your sorry ass back in that truck, and get on with what youre supposed to be doing!

Double-J and the officer looked up at Jimmy, the blue and amber lights dancing across their stunned faces. Rex realized he was holding his breath.

Thats right, the officer finally said, pointing at Double-J. Get this log off the road, immediately.

Double-J didnt seem to notice the officer as his eyes remained focused on Jimmy, who glared down at the teen. Finally Double-J turned his head and spat. Rex exhaled as he saw Double-J stomp back to the tow truck, the officer following. Jimmy jumped back off the log and kept his vision focused on Double-J and the officer as he walked backwards slowly until he reached the vans door.

ぼ喝鳥莉-硃莽莽 kyids, Jimmy muttered as he climbed back into the van.

Rex closed his window as the hydraulic winch on the tow truck lowered. Double-J exited the truck and retrieved chains from a rear compartment. As he watched Double-J wrap the chains around the wide trunk and hook them to the winch, Rex sighed with relief. But then he looked over at Jimmy, muttering under his breath behind the vans steering wheel.

The winchs hydraulics lifted the upper portion of the tree off the pavement. The orange lights of the truck pulled out into the open field, dragging the obstacle off the road. The officer tossed large detritus of bark and limbs into the field, then waved the van forward as he stepped onto the gravel shoulder. Jimmy pulled ahead, stopping as he came up to the officer.

We done here? Jimmy asked.

Move along, the officer replied, without looking at Jimmy.

Jimmy nodded and drove past the dismembered remnant of the tree. He stopped the van next to Double-J, who was now retrieving the trucks chains. Jimmys window was still open, and he called to Double-J. That was really stupid, what you just did.

Double-J smirked. I knew what I was doing.

You see that bulge on his right hip? You dont mess with people carrying guns, Jolly.

Im not -

Why werent you at practice tonight?

Double-J pointed at the tow truck. Working.

Jimmy began rolling up his window. Tell Lefty you aint working next Tuesday, Jolly.

My names not fucking -

The windows ascent stopped. Start of practice next Tuesday, Jimmy said. We fence to five touches, you choose the weapon. You beat me, I call you whatever you want. Until then, youre Jolly.

Double-J chuckled. Saber. You wont get two touches off me.

Jimmy nodded. See you Tuesday, Jolly, he said as his window closed.

As the van pulled forward, Rex shifted uneasily in the passenger seat and looked over at Jimmy. The hum of the vans engine, the rhythmic sweep of the windshield wipers, the soft patter of rain and wet snow on the metal roof there wasnt enough sound to distract from the awkward silence. When the van turned left at the second street, Rex finally said, Hey.

唻梗硃堯?

What happened back there

Was pretty fucked up. Rex sensed this wasnt the time for a follow-up question. Only thing I want is to be left alone. Back in the fall it was some other rookie, a lady cop. She pulled me over, told me my tires looked low. I was like, Dont tell me youre stopping any white folk and checking their PSI. That day I decided to go to the station, tell them I was tired of this shit. Sarge said hed tell his folks to leave me alone, but then he asked for my plate, and I was like, I aint giving you nothing, all you gotta do is tell your folks -

Sorry. Rex saw Jimmy stiffen at the interruption. My familys trailer - the slender teen pointed out and to the right its coming up.

Huh, Jimmy said as he applied the brakes. Here close on five years, but aint never been up round here.

Nobody comes here unless they have to, Rex replied.

Jimmy steered the van into a small field of muddy dirt, barren save for random articles of trash: newspapers, plastic jugs, a headless doll. The vans headlights illuminated the trailer, a sheet of cloudy plastic peeling away from a front window. The door opened wide enough to let out a large German Shepherd, which sprinted down the wooden steps and raced towards the van, barking loudly. Jimmy stopped the van and the dog leapt onto the drivers door, the beasts jaws snapping demonically at the window. Jimmy drew back, his eyes wide. Damn.

Rex rolled down his window and whistled. Rocky, come. The hound drew back from Jimmys door and ran over to Rexs side. You gonna talk to that sarge again? Rex asked.

Yeah. And Ill keep going back, until the message gets through. Jimmy rested his hands in his lap and looked out to his left.

Sorry you have to put up with that. Jimmy kept looking out to his left, so Rex wasnt sure he was listening. People around here, theyre mostly good, but sometimes they just they have a lot of fear and ignorance too. And sometimes it gets the better of them.

Guessing youre right. Jimmy wiped his mouth with his right hand, then turned to Rex. Im also guessing you aint really talking about me any longer.

Rex froze. Red Skeleton. Chief Scarecrow. Iriqueer. Jimmy nodded towards him. There something you want to tell me, son?

The teen shook his head and blinked. No. No, sir. He reached to open his door, but stopped on feeling Jimmy grab his forearm. The teen turned, his eyes meeting Jimmys stare, the look used by the new assistant fencing coach at Bark Bay High School when he was through playing with you.

That fear and ignorance you mentioned, Slim, its everywhere. Theres no hiding from it. Sooner or later its gonna come for you - you wont know when or how, but theres no stopping it. All you can do is be ready when it comes, and do all you can to meet it on your own terms.

Rex nodded. That why you didnt get out of the van when the officer asked you?

If Id stepped out this van, no matter what happened next, no matter what I did or said, I was a dead man. Only way to prevent walking into my funeral was to stay where I was, take some control of the situation while keeping my hands out where that cop could see them. You see what Im saying?

Yeah, Rex replied. But I gotta ask, you running out when Double-J started arguing with the cop. What was that about?

Jimmy scoffed and released his grip on Rexs forearm. Dont get any ideas, Slim. Next time one of you kyids starts mouthing off to the police, Im gonna sit back and watch them blow your fool head off.

Rocky began to bark again. I better get going, Rex said as he rolled up the van window and opened the door. Thanks again for the ride home. He stepped out into the wet mud, turned to shut the van door, then paused and looked up at Jimmy. Youre from the south, arent you?

Born and raised in Louisiana. Why you ask?

Just curious. Louisianas a long way from Bark Bay. Mind if I ask how you wound up all the way up here?

Rex expected a less cartoonish version of the Klansmen rumor, yet Jimmy didnt respond immediately. Rex was about to apologize when Jimmy finally answered.

Bugs. I hate bugs, Slim. Dont like this cold up north, but least it keeps most of the damn bugs away.

Rex doubted this explanation would dispel any rumors. See you next Tuesday, Mr. Saunders.

Just Jimmy. I aint mister nobody, or coach nobody. You got that, Slim?

Rex nodded, then closed the passenger door. Rocky resumed barking and pursued the van as it backed out of the dirt driveway. Rex turned and walked up the decaying wooden steps leading to his familys trailer as the van pulled onto the road, Rocky continuing to bark until its taillights disappeared.

END


窪蹋勛圖厙 the Author

Keigh Ahr is the pen name of Ken Rogers, a resident of Northeast Ohio. His fiction has appeared in the Scarlet Leaf Review, The Forthcoming Anthology, and the Take Five Anthology. His essay Essential was recently published in Voices from the Edge, a collection of essays by workers in front-line industries during the COVID-19 pandemic. While writing and reading are his favorite activities, hes also fond of doing his own yard work, which he does reasonably well, and grilling, where his success has been decidedly intermittent.